February 12th, 2016

I’m 30, I’m Single, & I Don’t Care!

Yes, you read that right! You don’t need to do a double take. Writing about this topic has been on my heart for a while, but at the time, my website was under construction. However, during that period, God gave me clear confirmation that there was a sense of urgency to share what I’m about to touch on.

The purpose of this post is to encourage others who maybe in a rut, approaching their 30’s & comparing their life’s journey to others.

Ok, so your approaching 30, now what?? You have a TON of plans made. You want to be married, have kids, a million dollars in the bank or to even know you have found Mr. Right… Right? Ha. Yeah, the American dream. Uhh… whose dream was this anyway? And why are we living up to someone else’s dream? What happened to the belief that God knows what is best for us? He is the Creator of all things and chose us in such a special way that He knew the numbers of hairs on our head, right? Or is that only for married people with kids? Well, I am here to tell you that I just turned 30. I don’t have any of those things & I am at peace.

Many people “fear” this age because they start to think of what they “don’t” have or where they wish they were in life. Maybe you feel as if you don’t have a purpose or that you’re not living in your purpose? Maybe you’re waiting on God’s promises to come into fruition? Well, whatever the reason may be, I just want you to know that God’s timing is not always our timing & at the right time God has a way of taking the world’s idea of perfection & blowing it right out of the water with His promises for your life. So, although I don’t have all those things that I mentioned before, I am expectant & excited to see what my Heavenly Father is preparing me for.

It’s easy to get caught up in comparing your journey with others, however it will stem into jealousy & that’s dangerous. The Bible shows us that when we reduce ourselves to comparing our lives and accomplishments to others, we end up fighting a battle that we were never even made for. So, if you need someone to compare your life to, look towards the people in the Bible. There are many examples that will edify you in whatever season you are in.

The age 30 is actually a significant age in the Bible & demonstrates the impossible being made possible through God’s authority.

Here are some examples:

  • Jesus started His ministry at 30 (Luke 3:23)
  • David became King at 30 (2 Samuel 5:4)
  • Joseph stepped out of his wilderness season & became 2nd to Pharaoh at 30 (Genesis 41:46)
  • Ezekiel was called by God as a prophet at age 30 (Ezekiel 1:1)
  • John the Baptist was 30 when he came out from the wilderness to pave the way for the Messiah (Jesus)

As you can see, 30 is the bomb age in the Bible and we should be celebrating the significance of growing into our destinies, not sulking & depressed trying to figure out what’s next. People stepped into their purpose at this age. So if you are not sure what is going on, it’s ok!

“Let your hope be in the Word & God’s promises & not the world & it’s compromises.”

So, what did I do on my 30th birthday? I actually was on a plane leaving from Cape Town, South Africa to America. Yes, I was on a plane for my Birthday. I was actually leaving my home from the last three years transitioning back to Atlanta; the next place God was sending me to for my (now) next season. Before I left, many people were saying “wow you are flying on your birthday; that sucks!” Well, actually, no it didn’t, this time was significant for me. Our birthday & purpose on this earth is to glorify God. It was actually an honor & significant to fly on my Birthday. It represented so many things to me. I was stepping into a new season, age & destination. I wouldn’t have changed that day for anything. I also wasn’t just traveling but stepping out on faith. I left my life, friends, job & church family to step into the unknown. I don’t know what this next season holds for me, but I know the One who holds it in His hands.

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I actually knew of someone who locked themselves up in their room & didn’t leave their house on their 30th Birthday because they felt they were not where they wanted to be when the clock struck twelve. That’s not ok. Age doesn’t determine specific milestones for success. True success is walking in God’s will for your life & that is at any age! We have to be in tune & close to God to know exactly what that is. Just like you spend time with your friends & family, you KNOW them, their desires, likes & dislikes. How do you know this? – You know these things because you spend time with them. The more you spend time with them, the more you know them. Just like God, as you seek Him you will know Him. You will soon have the convictions & peace to go & do what He wants you to do, then everything will be added unto you when it is suppose to.

“Seek the kingdom of God above all else & everything will be added unto you.” – Matthew 6:33

I actually did a daily video countdown to my 30th. I know when you think “ok, countdown, what were you excited for?” Well, normally you do a countdown when you have it all together & are excited to celebrate something new. The world’s standards would cause one to hide themselves like a turtle in their shell. Except, I was putting myself out there in the complete opposite way, without the world’s care. I was celebrating the courage to step out into the unknown by faith alone. I didn’t know exactly where I was going & how I would get there, but I just trusted God & He carried me through it all.

 

Never allow age, friends, family or anyone to determine where you “should” be in your life. If God had considered age, why didn’t He use Jesus earlier in life? After all, He was the chosen Messiah. Maybe God knew Jesus’s life would have been taken and the promise would have not been accomplished. God demonstrates his love to keep us from certain situations for our protection.

“When you are ready, whatever you desire will be directed by God and you will be so thankful you didn’t rush His will for your life.”

So rejoice in knowing that your protected, loved & guided by the Most High, Jesus Christ.

Like I said, I don’t know what the future holds but I am taking it day by day.

It’s the peace that surpasses all understanding that confirms that I am in the right place.

“For I know the plans I have you says the Lord,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11

“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you where you go.” – Joshua 1:9 

Love,

Jules

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Let the adventure begin!


80 responses to “I’m 30, I’m Single, & I Don’t Care!”

  1. Jasmine says:

    This is amazing!!!!

  2. Heather Lindsey says:

    Girl!!! You just preached that thing & backed it up with scripture!! Yes!! Get it!

  3. Anonymous says:

    wow! God bless you Jules. I’m in my twenties, single and content. This so much encouragement of God’s leading in my career and relationship decisions. Thank you for sharing.

  4. Carlesha says:

    Thank you for this, we’re in the same boat! Glad to see another 30 year old single woman who is content in the Lord and His timing. I just visited Capetown in January and it is BEATUIFUL!

  5. Ruth Nzioka says:

    Hey Jules,Thank you for sharing this wonderful message from our Lord Jesus.For me this message was more than the number 30.Its a message that all ladies waiting in the Lord should hear.The fact that He does hold our lives in His wonderful hands.His plan for our life remains perfect and we should rest in this.I am not there yet,that is where my faith is beyond care yet i know this is the journey the Lord has been taking me through.I thank the Lord for using you and I stumbling on your blog.God bless you and all the single ladies waiting upon our Lord Jesus,not just for marriage but everything.

  6. Elisa Lawrence Ramey says:

    This was beautifully written Juliette!!! So proud of you! Sending you Hampton Hugs from the queen city!!!

  7. It is always awesome to know that there is someone like you out there standing up for the reality of God’s Word and His purposes towards us. I am a man 3 years past 30, and before now I had unwittingly and feverishly conformed to the world, setting my priorities upside down. Instead of “seeking first His kingdom and righteousness”, I sought after the “other things” that my God is more than able to do for me. And I did all that because somewhere in my subconscious I believe my identity and success depended on these things…like getting married with kids and having loads of cash. Now I know they are all fringe benefits that would definitely come when God deems fit….so now I am more focused on my purpose and relationship with God. That’s what matters the most, not because I don’t care about the other things but because they’ve been already taken care of….”for the plans He has for me are of good and an expected end”.

    Jules thanks for sharing.

  8. Jessica says:

    This just blessed my life! Thanks 🙂

  9. Andani says:

    this is such a good read. I am on my 20s, I had to breakup with what “Heather like to call a Lil boyfriend ” I did this because I felt that God was calling me to so much greater.

    even though I was scared, I just had tap into faith and trust God……Believe me when I say now I more content than I have ever been in my life.

    And I bumped into this blog, very encouraging. keep it up sis

  10. Anonymous says:

    Thank you for that article. I’m turning 30 soon and the pressure has been to fit into societies norm and settle for less than i deserve is all i get. Thank you for the encouragement and be blessed.

  11. Dominique Harris says:

    Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Every word you wrote was the exact articulation of a conversation I was having with a few friends at the end of 2015. Most people don’t have this HEALTHY perspective about life when approaching or moving pass 30. The enemy is very crafty in getting people to think they are missing out on “marriage” or “kids” or “success” or whatever the case may be and that’s all they focus on and end up missing the time and season they are in “NOW” . So when marriage, house, kids, etc. come along its not what it seems and they realize the wait would have been worth it. Live for what God has for you now and plan for tomorrow and you will never lose sight of where you are going because He is the perfect life guide. P.s. I turn 30 Feb 20th and couldn’t be more excited about how God will amaze me with His greatness.
    Keep writing and I’ll keep reading.
    God Bless- Dom

  12. Carissa says:

    Thank you

  13. Evita says:

    Jules, this is awesome on so many levels. It makes me sad that I didn’t connect with you sooner and more often while you were in CPT. Ur blog is a reminder that God is awesome, everything works together for His good, it’s a matter of being open completely to His workings for us and within us. Lots of love from Cape Town

  14. Lynnette M says:

    This was an awesome read! I’ve been to the Gathering Oasis church a few times and for some reason, when the pastor asks the prayer team to come up at the end of service, I always find myself looking at you… I always think “there’s something special about her.” You just look so inviting and full of joy… It must be the Jesus in you… And I cannot believe you’re 30! You look really good. May God continue to use you.

  15. Sisi says:

    Thank you! I needed to read this. May God continue to bless you Jules!

  16. Anonymous says:

    Amen amen amen , I thank God for your words of wisdom , you are so bless my dear, God timing always so perfect , 5am im turning in my bed check my phone , there it is my sweet God’s fearing Pixel leave me a link go read this. God make no mistakes , That’s my new saying ever since early December, every struggle,test, testimony that I’m dealing with i always find myself saying that God make no mistake, God timing always on point, here im turning 30 on March 8th , single, no kids, no career, 6months ago I really didn’t know what to do I was so confused,blindsided, so depressed about the fact soon I will be 30 , didn’t know what to do or who. to turn to, but about 4months ago I had a lot happening to me, feel like I was dreaming ,losing a lots that were matters to me ,but iin the middle of it all one thing was for sure our God Almighty was always there with me shaping me up, molding me , preparing me for a new beginning, a fresh start, God want me to start living my life by faith not by fear , God wanted me to be closer to him , to seek his kingdom , to pray him more to have that bound with him , see now im more happier than ever , feel free and at peace , I will never stop worshiping our God Almighty , for breaking me down before my 30th birthday , now I let God take control of my life, I know it’s not what I want , but what God want for my life , im God’s children, in his living testimony, God make no mistake that’s the reason I’m here in your blog this morning, so your scriptures can breath into my life , I thank God for that and im forever grateful , your words save lives, God bless you stay bless sweet angel of God.

  17. Anonymous says:

    This is amazing! Great article, I’m 24 searching for God and trying to be content with Him alone. You are beautiful btw

  18. So loving this.. This is perfectly true

  19. Anonymous says:

    Wow, I just stumble on your blog and I’m so glad I did; I’m a lady above 30, single and no kids. I know God make all things beautiful in His time and he says the thought He has for me are good and not evil to give me an expected end. Thanks for your messages, it’s really encouraging, you are an angel.

  20. Hello there says:

    I’m 35, single with no kids ! I love it !

  21. Simplytsk says:

    I’m 35! No kids! Everything you stated is true!

  22. Adina says:

    This is so encouraging and true !! I’m 28 and approaching the 30 mile mark… And I have seen how God changed my attitude and thinking about being single and focusing more on serving Him than anything else..I agree with your view and glad I’m not alone 🙂 . Thank you for sharing especially this weekend!! I’m also for Atlanta 🙂 may the Father bless you my sister in Christ!

  23. lilian says:

    I thank God that i come across this post and it has given me a reason to continue to hold on i didnt understand things at first but now i understand.Am turning 31 in a few days and this post has encouraged me given me hope that God still has me in His mind thank you so much..pray with me that i may be more content ib this season.

  24. Dale Allen says:

    Jules you literally took some of the words right out of my mouth. You also gave me some new insight. God bless you and keep serving the Lord and inspiring hearts. You have a POWERFUL ministry. Love it!

  25. MarieMc says:

    I am with you 100% I have kids..but I’m single and soon to be 54 but enjoying being single….enjoy reading your blog.

  26. Shanna says:

    I’m already in my 30s but this was SOOO on time. I appreciate you willingness to be open and honest about where you are at this juncture in your life. Once I hit my thirties it seems like everyone around me started asking when are you going to get married, don’t you want kids. And my answer was YES, however I don’t want to rush into something like marriage and not be ABSOLUTELY sure this is the man God intended for me to be with forever. So I’m 33, will be 34 in 7 days and I’m learning to accept the place God has me in right now. Thanks for sharing.

  27. Tristian Pickens says:

    Thank you so much for this post. I’m turning 30 in June and everything you spoke about is what I feel currently. You have awesome ministry ahead of you! Can’t wait! I celebrate you my sister in Christ!

  28. Anonymous says:

    Thank you for sharing, my daughter with the same name ( Jules) , I pray she was coping as well as you are.. God bless you.

  29. Nec says:

    Definitely confirmation. Amen!

  30. Thanking for you, dear sis Juliette… God is sooo good n He just knows wat each of us need! n this post came like a mighty shake in my life, speaking ryt into my life too..Im 34, single, waiting on d Lord even in d midst of all the pressures of family n society !! Im soooo encouraged thru your post… Thank you so much! I pray n want my Daddy God to write my lovestory n build my family on Him n His Word!!! Thanks a ton again, sis.. stay blessed.

  31. Wambui says:

    Jules, thank you so much for the message. I can so relate with you because I have been raised in a large family. All my siblings of child bearing age have children.. Even my younger brother and sister. I love the fact that I turned 30 last year full of hope and peace because it was my year to receive my blessing. Everyone says 30 is the year when you look back on your life and it’s accomplishments… For me it had more to do with my personal journey… Loving me, being kinder to me, taking care of me and finding my relationship with God. I stopped comparing my life with my siblings and all my friends. I love who I am now than ever before. Not now will I change myself to fit into people’s boxes(opinions expressed). This is my life and I have taken charge of it. Thanks again be blessed abundantly.

  32. Janet says:

    This article has some great points, and I enjoyed reading it! I disagree with the implication though, that God did not use Jesus until he was 30. God used Jesus as a baby, as well as young boy preaching in the temple. God can use us at all ages and through all stages of life.

    • Anonymous says:

      @janet of course Jesus was used by God since birth , but he was baptized at 30 and it is only after turning 30 that he started preaching, called disciples and performed miracles.so we can say his career started at 30 .

  33. Amanda A says:

    GIRRRRLLLLLLL!!!! You just don’t know how much you blessed me with this blog post. I had some anxiety when I turned 30 this month but your blog reassured me that God is preparing me something great!!! Thank you for this blog post!! Keep writing, striving, and traveling!!! God is using you in a MIGHTY WAY!!!!

  34. I’m really enjoying the design and layout of your blog.

    It’s a very easy on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable for me
    to come here and visit more often. Did you hire out a
    developer to create your theme? Outstanding work!

  35. Stephanie says:

    Wow!! Thank you Jules! You inspired me

  36. Anonymous says:

    I just turned forty and I’m single with no kids.

  37. Anonymous says:

    Wow this is one beautiful Piece of writing …
    Thanks Mami writing this ….

    This is soo me 1st March 2016 …

    will be celebrating my 30th birthday … Not married , no children ..but I thank GOD for what i have ..
    GOD is faithful 🙂

  38. Anonymous says:

    This was a BLESSING. I’m not single but there is something here for any and everyone turning 30. Thankyou!!

  39. Ify M. says:

    I am so glad I stumbled on this. It’s like you spoke about my path and experience as I turned 30 last September! I was unapologetic, I travelled and spent my day in the Vatican in Rome and even saw the Pope.

    I am 30, single with no kids and I have so much I want to achieve but I am not letting age dictate it for me. I have accomplished a lot and still strive for more.

    I will not let the world lecture me on want to do at a certain point in my life.. I am tired of hearing ‘where is your boyfriend’ ‘maybe you’re too picky’ ‘don’t worry your husband is on the way’. All I desire to have a family soon, I know that I will not let it dictate how I live my life.

    I have recently migrated to Canada, leaving all I have loved i.e. family, life, friends, job and church behind and not knowing what the future holds. I am excited and terrified at the same time but I always hold on to the word of God.

  40. Anonymous says:

    Oh yes…I can buy this!Thanks for your encouraging words.This is exactly what I needed!

  41. Anonymous says:

    Thank you for putting this down in words. I’m turning 30 in a few days and it’s something of a daily battle to stay positive and optimistic about the future. Even more so because I’m not one to externalize my emotions or fears, it feels like I’m running a constant debate in my mind (the devil/angel on your shoulder senario).

    This post reinforces my resolve to learn to live every moment, love myself, and be thankful for the many, many, many blessings in my life; but most of all to let God do His work in me.

    I could go on and on, but I’ll summarize it with a ‘thank you’.

  42. April says:

    Confirmation… thank you for this!

  43. Ada says:

    Hi! Ummm can you be my best friend!? These are my thoughts exactly. I’m a few years younger (27) but I am soooo content. And if I’m 30 and single, I will still be in love with Jesus. Again, can we best friends? lol

  44. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Love you so so much. Don’t ever stop.

  45. Christine says:

    I didnt do nothing much on my 30th birthday but i didnt feel sorry for me either because I know everyone has their time to be successful. Hoping to fly somewhere on my next birthday

  46. This is amazing Jules! My birthday was a few weeks ago and I was so freaked out. I turned 27 this year but I am from a culture where for some reason getting married and pushing babies is so important in one’s 20s. Yes. in the church community too. Actually; especially in the church community and I spend 80% of my free time doing church stuff.

    I felt so uncomfortable and I remember saying I won’t celebrate my day because of how old I felt. Social media today isn’t helpful either as it’s a constant reminder to what’s happening in your peers’ lives, exes etc.

    It took God himself to rescue me from these bad thoughts and remind me of who I am. and that it doesn’t matter where I am at as long as He is with me. Phil 4:8 reminds us to think right. Good thoughts = joy= confidence.

    Thanks for sharing! I loved this article!

  47. Mkenya says:

    Its a good article, however in the ancient days guys used to live for over 900 years. so, 30 years then must have been a very young age. If you are 30 years now and you are not yet married, you should be worried.

  48. Efe says:

    So many can relate to this. Wonderful writeup 👏

  49. Peris says:

    I am turning 30 this year and I cringe whenever I remember it will happen. This is a reminder that God is in action in my life, he has a plan for my life a plan for Good. I am changing my mindset and I will start planning on how to spend it from now. I am blessed to experience the 30th year of my life.

  50. Hilario says:

    First off I would like to say great blog! I had a quick question that I’d like to ask if you do not mind. I was curious to know how you center yourself and clear your mind before writing. I’ve had a hard time clearing my thoughts in getting my thoughts out there. I do take pleasure in writing but it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are usually lost just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or hints? Thanks!

  51. Denielle says:

    Thank you for sharing your story sis! So many of us needed this.
    Check out my blog

    Gods love is Beyond Measure – His love saved me.
    https://yourloveisbeyondmeasure.wordpress.com/

  52. Miss Lowe says:

    Hey! This was a great read! I’m turning 30 this summer and had lots of questions like the points you touched on in this piece. It’s nice to know there are others like me still roaming around out here. Thank you for the inspiration. And the Biblical scriptures!

  53. Anonymous says:

    I believe God is speaking directly to me through you. I turned 31 in September and am single no kids etc. I have been asking lately what is wrong with me. Why can’t I find someone to love and marry. Am I going to be alone the rest of my life. Your message tonight reminded me of the very words I already knew. Thank you for your faith and courage to share. You have helped more people than you know

  54. Esther says:

    I’m very humbled by your article Jules. I am past 30 and i have been under pressure lately concerning marriage and kids. I believe in God’s timing and thank you because i know and believe that everything will come to pass and that God’s will for my life will be fulfilled at His own appointed time. Thank you for your encouragement and I’m liberated and happy that seeking His kingdom first and His righteousness everything else would added. Despite the tough time i’m going through i know that its just for a season and its not permanent and it does not define me. You are a blessing Jules.

  55. Anonymous says:

    I bought my car last year when I turned 30. We share alot in common Jules. Every word you said in your write up spoke to me and my life. Thanks for the encouragement. I am where I wanted to be thanks to God.

    God bless.

  56. Tasia says:

    Girl, this is the exact same situation I’m in. People always tend to be in my business about the goings on of my life. I’ll be 31 at the end of March and the comments are relentless, but you know what, I don’t care. Sometimes, we find ourselves in a space where we see other people doing things and feel sorry for ourselves, but I cast that down in the name of Jesus. This just refueled my fire. Thank you for this.

  57. Tony says:

    Thank you for posting this. I am in that rut you speak of. I am wondering if I will ever achieve the goals I had set for myself. thank you for reminding me that’s God’s timing is the perfect timing and that I should put my faith and trust in Him. God bless you.

  58. Absolutely LOVED this article. I shared it with my friends. God bless you and please continue writing and sharing. You never know who you are blessing 🙂 You blessed me. Thank you.

  59. Brandi LadiBee Hays says:

    I’ll be 35 this year and have been saying this the last 5 years since I made 30! This past year at 34 God has poured into me in such a way that I am excited that I am where I am, Thanks for an amazing article

  60. Vy says:

    This article is perfect! All of my friends and myself are turning 30 we are unmarried and have no kids as well. Some are taking it hard. I’m taking it as it’s an amazing milestone, I’m enjoying every moment in every season! My 20s were great overall and I cannot wait to see what 30s have in store for me! Thanks for sharing this girl 💃🏽

  61. Deirdre Nixon says:

    Great read!!

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  71. Jada Hite says:

    Absolutely loved this! I’m amazed at how many powerful men in the Bible started at 30- we always seem to forget this part!

  72. Tamara says:

    This blog is seriously so inspiring! Great job Juliette:) You’ve always been someone I’ve admired. So proud of you!! Keep doing all of this greatness.

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  74. Dee Ok says:

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  75. LohT says:

    Powerful piece, may the good Lord increase you sisi. To all my fellow sisters, grace is beyond sufficient for wherever the journey takes us. Let press into Him who doesn’t sleep nor slumber. OneLove

  76. Amber says:

    Just hit 30 this year. Loved this piece… I just had my mother tell me well your aunts are wondering why you’re still single? I asked why? Are they jealous. Cos their kids wont take care of em the way i take care of you and dad. Why? Cos im free and they’re not. Love is great id love to be in a relationship 1 day but due to medical reasons female issues im a loner. Im a loner cos i made the decision to put my parents first before anyone else. Im not against being in a relationship. If its what is meant to happen someday or not it will or wont happen. Im not rich wealth wise but rich at heart im no cindy Crawford but im mother Theresa.

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Jules The Explorer

Hi friends, welcome to my site! I’m so glad you are here. I started this blog to encourage & inspire you to step out in faith & do what God is calling you to do. I am not perfect, but am growing each day into the woman God has called me to be. My desire is for you to reach your God-given potential & to live a life worthy of the calling you have received.

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